- MOM TAUGHT ME TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside, I just finished cleaning!"
- MOM TAUGHT ME RELIGION
"You better pray that will come out of that carpet!"
- MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT TIME TRAVEL
"If you don't straighten up, I'll knock you into next week!"
- MOM TAUGHT ME LOGIC
"Because I said so, that's why!"
- MOM TAUGHT ME FORESIGHT
"Make sure you wear clean underwear in case you're in an accident."
- MOM TAUGHT ME IRONY
"Keep crying and I'll give you something to cry about!"
- MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT THE SCIENCE OF OSMOSIS
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper!"
- MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT CONTORTIONISM
"Will you look at the dirt on the back of your neck?"
- MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT STAMINA
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone!"
- MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT WEATHER
"It looks like a tornado went through your room!"
- MOM TAUGHT ME HOW TO SOLVE PHYSICS PROBLEMS
"If I yelled because I saw a meteor coming toward you, would you listen then?"
- MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT HYPOCRISY
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times-don't exaggerate!"
- MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION
"Stop acting like your father!"
- MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT ENVY
"There are millions of less fortunate kids in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do!"
And most of all.....
- MOM TAUGHT ME THE CIRCLE OF LIFE
"I brought you into this world, I can take you out"
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